January Redemption
For as long as I could
remember, the month of January was a black pit in our family. So much so that my dad (whose birthday is
January 31st) eventually said that he didn’t want his birthday
celebrated in January or even at all. In
the span of a few years, my uncle died, a dear friend of my mom’s was killed in
a car accident, and my aunt died (on my dad’s birthday). I also experienced two
devastating miscarriages in 2006 and 2008, both on January 15th. Needless to say, after the holidays, we all
generally held our breath when it came to this fateful month.
After my miscarriage in
2008, I confided in a dear friend that I didn’t understand why this continued
to happen. Didn’t God love me? Her words
in the days after have stuck with me to this day, “Even Jesus asked on the
cross, ‘God, why have you forsaken me?’” She told me that even though Jesus
asked God this, His faith was unwavering and He trusted in God’s bigger plan.
On that day, I made a conscious effort to trust God’s will for the life of our
family. Mother’s Day that year was painful. I left a church service, dejected
and depressed that God still had not blessed us with a baby. But little did I
know, three days later, two lines appeared. Unlike the first two times, my
heart was at complete peace and I knew that all was going to work out in our
favor. Nine months later, in 2009, we welcomed our first miracle, Charles
Aiden, on the coldest day of that
winter - January 15th.
The significance of the
day and month were not lost on me that busy day. I wept at the sight of my son,
but also at the reality that our family’s joy had been made complete. January
no longer had a hold on us. Since that
time, Charlie has and continues to bring unspeakable joy to every person we
come across. He is our blessing.
But our story doesn’t
end there. In 2010, when trying for Charlie’s sibling, we suffered another
miscarriage in March. I couldn’t understand why this was happening again –
hadn’t we learned our lesson? Hadn’t we learned to rely on God totally and
completely already? But that in and of itself was the struggle, here I was
thinking I had learned to trust God completely, but something negative happened
and I had begun to question Him again. I brushed myself off and remembered the
words of my friend. Ten months later, we welcomed Charlie’s brother, Jackson
Dean, in January.
When the hustle and
bustle of the holidays dies down, we no longer dread the 31 days that follow
December. We celebrate life and the re-birth of this month. Even Jesus asked,
“Why?” but still trusted in God’s plan for His life completely. Even in those
times of sorrow and despair, I encourage you to do the same. May God redeem the
“January” in your own life.
Praise the Lord!!
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Visiting through the blog hop. Samantha's testimony was so heartfelt and beautiful. I am sure people will be encouraged by it.
ReplyDeleteGreat blog. I will be back to visit.
http://holimess.blogspot.com/
Thanks for stopping by, God bless you!
ReplyDeleteWhat a precious story. Your family is beautiful.
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