I Hope It's Okay With You

8x10 print from Hello Awesome

I miss blogging.

What can I say? Lately God has been revealing a lot about myself and my heart. I've thinking lately how I lost the true joy of this online experience. The reason why I started three years ago. And it wasn't to try and gain followers. It wasn't to have sponsors or collaborate with companies. Even though those things are great, I started to make a connection. With someone who might be going through the same thing. With people who need a word of encouragement. A place to grow, learn while meeting a need.

All the feelings I had about blogging being an addiction were true. It was. Because I had lost the reason for starting. I had lost focus. I had lost myself in a world where giveaways have replaced journaling, Pinterest-wannabe homes replaced reality and numbers replaced spirit. 

I believe when we take things too seriously, we can squeeze every ounce of joy left. Life is serious sometimes but it is also full of laughs and heartfelt moments. Treating my blog like a business got out of hand because I got out of His hand. I forgot who really owns this space. It is not for just me. It is a platform to encourage and love. To give without obsessing about receiving. I want to get back to that.

This blog started as a journal and I don't want to forget. When my heart speaks, things change. I change. People can be moved. Even more, when He speaks through us, mountains can be moved. I had decided a while ago to walk away from blogging and it was necessary. To listen to Him about what I should do.
Obedience is better than sacrifice. Obeying what He wants me to do and giving Him honor is better than just throwing in the towel during hard times. Though taking a break helps maintain a clear head, God doesn't want me to give up what I love if it can somehow bring Him glory. 

So here I am once again. No agenda. No expectations. Just someone who wants to connect and make a difference. First within herself. I'm learning not to make promises I can't keep just to please others. I'm learning to let go and let God. I'm learning that the value of this life is not dependent on works. I'm learning to truly love people and serve them.

Whether it is once a day, once a week or once a month...I still would love to write here. I would love to share and connect with you all. About life, love, God, homes, children, creativity...everything. 

And I hope that is okay with you.